I love my parrot more than my partner

‘ He that binds to himself a joy

Does the winged life destroy

But he who kisses the joy as it flies

Lives in eternal sun rise’

William Blake

“I love my Parrot more than my partner.”

The headline caught Joey’s attention as he waited for the red light to turn green. I could see how you could love your parrot more than your partner, he thought. Parrots could be much more loving  that humans. And then there’s the advantage of being able to put it n a cage or cover it with a cloth when it chattered too much, he thought. His mind wandered along as the car behind him tooted impatiently.

“Perhaps the parrot is an award winning bird. Or a hard working performing artiste who earns a lot of money for its owner,” he murmured. “It’s possible that his partner is the opposite and instead of earning money, spends it,” he grumbled. The car behind blasted him again as he crawled to a halt beside the next set of traffic lights.

My day dreaming about parrots has delay his homeward journey by at least sixty seconds Joey grinned as the driver behind him changed lanes ready to shoot off at the first sign of a blinking light. Joey slid the car into gear and smoothly moved off again. He found that his mind was still on the headline he’d glimpsed. “I wonder if it has anything to do with love. Perhaps the parrot is a fun loving bird and his partner is dull and morose,” he thought.

Pulling into the driveway to his house he glanced around appreciatively and gave himself a mental clap on the back. It was just a basement flat in what used to be a big country house but it had its own entrance and bell, so he always thought of it as his house.

Polli was watching a chat show on television. She fixed him with a stare and went back to focusing on the telly. He sniffed the air. No smell of cooking. It was then he remembered it was his turn to bring home a Chinese takeaway. He had been so preoccupied thinking about the parrot he’s driven past the place “Sorry, love – forgot the Chinese – too busy thinking about the parrot – don’t fret I have a healthier option for you,” he smiled.

For a fraction of a second Polli swivelled her eyes away from the telly. “Parrot?” she exclaimed. Ah, that got her attention, he thought.

“Paper headline – somebody loves their parrot more than their partner.” Polli’s eyes shot venom at him. “At least you can train a parrot – something you can’t do, apparently with humans,” she snapped Joey loosened his tie. He knew she was having a go at him for forgetting the food.

Polli blasted the TV with the remote control and unwounded her body from the chair. “Why don’t we go out to eat? It’s been ages since we went out to eat. We used to always go out before you bought this…caged,” she lamented.

Joey turned away. Money had been plentiful when he’d bought their little love  coop. Now, with the recession, business was slow and money was tight. “If you got a part-time job…on the internet,” he said hastily…”You’re always on it anyway,” he muttered under his breath. He could see that her feathers were definitely ruffled now. “Anyway, I have something to eat that’s far better for you than a Chinese takeaway or a meal out in a fancy restaurant,” he chirped. But Polli was in full flight now and wasn’t going to be appeased. “Oh, yes, that would suit you just fine if I got a job that kept me at home all the time. You could keep me behind bars in this dungeon.”

Joey could feel his patience beginning to slip. “It’s a pity I couldn’t train you to keep that beak of your shut once in a while,” he bellowed.

“Pity I’m not a parrot. You could cover me up so you wouldn’t have to listen to me,” Polli screeched back.

“What happened here?” the female police officer asked, taking in the bars on the basement flat window and the bird seed scattered all over the chairs and the floor. Polli and Joey started to talk at the same time. “I was only trying to cover her – shut her up…keep her quiet,” Joey exclaimed spreading out his hands.

“You are a liar! Polli screeched at him. “You couldn’t be bothered to bring home the Chicken Chow Mein and then you tried to feed me bird seed!”

The WPC looked from one to the other.

“But I wouldn’t harm you my little Polli Parrot. I do love you more than I love my partner.” The policewoman tried and failed to hide her grin. Her face sobered and she turned towards Joey. “You don’t live here together?”

Joey smiled indulgently at her and gave Polli a squeeze. “Of course we live here together, officer. “It’s just that sometimes my little Polli wants to fly the nest –”

“Let me get this straight,” the WPC said a perplexed look on her face. “You live together and share this little nest – as you put it  but Polli, here, is not your partner. But you love her more than your partner?”

Joey nodded vigorously.

“You got it in one Officer.”

“May I ask where you work,” she asked eyeing his spattered green overalls.

“Me? I work at the bird sanctuary on Birdsong Road,” he said proudly. “My partner helps me to run it,” he said his mouth turning down at the corners. “I meant my Polli here, no harm. I was just trying to train her to eat a healthier diet. But as you can see I’m not having much success,” he said sighed deeply.

The policewoman stopped at the top of the basement steps. “If you take my advice you’ll let your Polli test her wings every now and then, sir.”

Joey looked doubtful. “You think so,” he murmured unconvinced.

The policewoman nodded. “I do. You’re heard the old adage, sir. A bird that flies away but returns to the nest is truly yours,” she said.

Joey smiled.”Ah, but what about the saying,’A bird in the hand…?”

“Goodnight, sir. Keep the noise down. It’s just a basement flat you have here, not a pigeon loft, sir.